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ALL IS not LOST

I worked hard to get where I am today.

No one can say I didn't earn everything I have. I grew up in a dysfunctional home which make most people shake their head but in my mind it's normal. It was all I knew. I won't repeat the mistakes my father made.

I went to school- got educated. Met a boy- fell in love. Didn't work out but it's okay. I'm in no rush to meet someone who I can spend the rest of my life with.

Was homeless for awhile- oh boy that was fun. Don't think I want to go down that road again, no matter how humbling it was.

Went to enlist- traveled across the world to a place I would have never dreamed I'd set foot on. Seen bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people. It's life. Traveled across the beauty that is known as Panjwai. 

I've meet all sorts of people. Some I can't remember a thing about and others are forever imprinted in my heart and mind.

Some people think I'm not okay right now.

I just want to laugh and laugh and laugh when they say that.

If anyone goes through what I will forever call the unspeakable march and is okay I will call them crazy. Only a fool or a heartless person could be perfectly fine.

I'm still naive in so many ways. I still have so much to learn. I won't stay in the military. I won't make a career out of this. I'll go somewhere else in life and see where that takes me. I'll finish my degree, I'll travel the world, I'll sing and dance and love and live and cry and laugh and kill and be killed.  And I'll never stop learning.

The only thing I need is the continued strength to endure everything that comes my way. It only makes me stronger.